3rd or 5th Wheel...Which is Worse?

First off, I am so grateful that my, "coupled" friends invite me along on their outings. I always have a great time. But as I was looking at the pictures of our most recent outing - awesome Chickasha Festival of the Lights- I came across this picture.

The symmetry wasn't right in it. 2, 2, 1.  My poor Jill had to take pictures with her boyfriend, his parents, and then......there's me. Don't forget me. I need someone to take pictures with!!!  It was almost like, "hold that pose!!". Take out boyfriend, insert single friend. Now rinse and repeat.

The good news is, I will always have Jill. And her boyfriend Kyle does a pretty good job of including me. Even when the symmetry is off. :)  Thank you both for trying your best to not make me feel like a 3rd or 5th wheel.

Single Leprosy

Why is it that singles and couples can't do things together? Is the term, "three is a crowd" really true? Do you really need the fourth person to find balance? In today's society, it seems you do. Couples like doing things with other couples. You see couples going on dates with other couples, having other couples over dinner, taking trips, etc together. What happened to the single friend? Why are they singled out when it comes to these things?

As a single gal, it kind of leaves you a little hurt when friends you hung out with when you were a couple no longer include you anymore.  Now, you have single leprosy. Couple friends no longer want you around. Am I not as fun now that I am the only one? Or is it that three really is a crowd and four is where you find the balance?

To Thine Own Self, Be True

F. Scott Fitzgerald once said, "I hope you live a life your proud of. If you find you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again."

January 2013, I have decided to start all over again. Sometimes our lives become so filled with fluff that we sometimes loose sight of what's most important. It can be such a gradual fade, that you don't realize that it's  happening. But what's most important, the moment you wake up and see that this isn't the life you're proud of, you make a change. And that is what I started yesterday. For the month of January I have chosen to limit my interaction with society(including friends) so that I can refocus and find balance in my life. I welcome change.

Surviving Singleness During the Holidays-Part 3

When I think of New Years, I envision Times Square, confetti, toasting, counting down those last 10 seconds of the New Year, and of course, that amazing kiss at New Years while gazing into that special someone's eyes and wishing them a Happy New Year. Those images aren't the most ideal for someone being single. Quite frankly, that last vision can be quite depressing. But being single allows you to stop and embrace the moment to the fullest, for there is no distraction. And there's no better time than on New Years to embrace and reflect, for New Years is about the past, present and future. 

The Past is a time of reflection before midnight. Of all the things the past year brought. Good and bad. The present would allow us to live in the moment. That very second the clock strikes midnight. And the future is what all of us look so forward too. The New Year and longing to embrace it. 

A friend told me that whatever we are doing at midnight, is what your year will be filled with.  New Years 2012 was surrounded with amazing friends and.... dateless. Guess what? 2012 was a year with lots of memories with my friends and 100% single!  This New Years was different. It was spent being a Mother. At midnight, a chair had found Layton, Adrianna, and me all in it while laughing, smiling, and of course, a kiss at midnight. Shortly after, I went to pick up Preston who was at a youth group party. I never know how the cards will have it, but I believe fate put it this way that night. Preston is getting older and spreading his wings while Layton and Adrianna are still close in my arms. Seasons change. And I feel that this New Years brought change upon us in a good way.

Robert Burn's poem is the most thought of on New Years. I really enjoy the original for I think it truly rings true with someone being single. This is the original song was written in 1711 by James Watson as follows: 

Should Old Acquaintance be forgot,
and never thought upon;
The flames of Love extinguished,
and fully past and gone:
Is thy sweet Heart now grown so cold,
that loving Breast of thine;
That thou canst never once reflect
On Old long syne.

The past is old long ago. I'm ready for the New Year and new memories with old friends. For the past will never be the future. So why turn back? Lets embrace the present and look towards the future. Happy New Years! 

“Mama always said you could tell an awful lot about a person by the kind of shoes they wear.” – Forrest Gump

Surviving Singleness During the Holidays-Part 2

Christmas has arrived with all the Christmas movies and songs that make someone lonely. Couples are everywhere! It's not a vision of sugarplums...it's visions of couples holding hands, playing in the snow, and kissing under the mistletoe! Yes, it rhymed and it was lame. But it's true! Amongst all these moments that surround you, there's actually perks to being single during Christmas. Here's my top 5:

1) No stress in buying him a gift!!!
2) You get to treat yourself with a gift. One that you want!!! Merry Christmas to me!!!
3) Make a new tradition for yourself. Helping at a homeless shelter or maybe doing a super girly tree in pink or purple.
4) Cuddling up by the fire, relaxing with a cup of hot coco, and watching a movie. Go ahead! You're not out fighting the crowds at the malls.
5)Get creative! You can cook or try something new that you want for Christmas dinner.

Without someone to focus on, you can embrace the real meaning of Christmas. Not the commercial one with all the gifts and hoop-la, but the one that has Jesus in your life. You can take this time to reflect on what matters the most and what the true meaning of Christmas is. Happy Birthday Jesus!

Merry Christmas Everyone and to all a good night!

Country Girl gone City Girl Musings

Upon traveling home for Thanksgiving, I realized that the kids and I haven't been to Missouri as a collective family in a year!!  That would make me a very bad daughter, sister, and friend. Being away from my roots made me realize how the city has taken ahold of this once country girl.

-My love for wearing high heels does not mix well with walking in gravel. 

-Everything is so relaxed there. You stop and enjoy things verses always being on the go. 

-Family is your life. It's not just your immediate family, but your Aunts, Uncles, and Cousins.

-Your childhood friends are amazing. There is nothing like sharing with someone you've know for 30+years. 

-The country accent wants to come out. Ya'll, the twang, and the slowing and slurring of words was at the tip of my tongue. 

-My choice in music has changed. Or maybe it has been broadened? I discovered that not only do my girlfriends not know of Lamborghini Mercy, but they don't have a rap station in Springfield either. At least not to their knowledge. And it seems all I find on my scanning of stations is country. 

-You do alot of sitting in the car. I love the city for the mere fact that in 5 minutes you can be most anywhere! Country?? 20 minutes at a minimum. 

-Sweet Tea and Fried Food is everywhere!!!!

What do all these findings mean? Country- I love you, but City...I love you MORE! Yee Haw!!!!

Walking in a Singles Wonderland

Sleigh bells ring, are you listening,

  In the lane, snow is glistening

  A beautiful sight,

  I'm so happy tonight.

  Walking in a singles wonderland.

Gone away is the drama,

Here to stay is good karma

I sing a single song,

As I go along,

Walking in a singles wonderland.

In the meadow I can build a snowman,

Then pretend that he is tall and hot

He'll say: Are you married?

I'll say: No man,

But you can come around

When you're in town.

Later on, I'll conspire,

As I dream by the fire

To face unafraid,

The plans that I've made,

Walking in a singles wonderland.

In the meadow I'm building a snowman,

This time he's a knight in shining armor.

I'll have lots of fun with mister snowman,

The idea was lots of fun to ponder

When your single, ain't it thrilling,

Endless freedom is so fulfilling

I'll frolic and play, the singles way,

Walking in a singles wonderland.

A Journey is Best Measured in Friends, Rather Than in Miles

 I have been fortunate enough to continually be the recipricant of amazing friends. One person can truly never have enough. So many friends have walked with me through my struggles and triumphs. Through the laughter and the tears. Through all my ups and downs. While some friends are silver and others are gold, they will all be platinum in my heart. For these special friends will forever be in my journey through life. I appreciate you.

 

Cinderella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life.

Surviving Singleness During the Holidays-Part 1

Other than Valentine's Day- Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's can be tough times for a single person.  Unless we fight it; anxiety, depression, and feeling lonely can consume us. We all have our moments of each of these, but I prefer to embrace -not ignore- those for what they are. What are they? They are moments that make us a stronger, more beautiful person in the end. They teach us to persevere through times that are not optimal. In the end, we can stand taller, walk with confidence, and know that our life is greater because of those moments.

As Thanksgiving quickly approaches, I wanted to reflect on specific things that a single girl on Thanksgiving can appreciate.

1)Everyone wants you at their house. Not only your immediate family. *Feeling Loved*
2) Less houses to visit because you don't have to visit his family's house. This equals less stress and you can relax more. Maybe even take a nap. I know, can you believe it? A nap! Who knew?
3) Go ahead, unbutton your pants after eating. You don't have a man to impress.
4) You don't have to worry about the guy thinking you're a pig. Go ahead. Have that second, I'm mean third helping.
5)Instead of having to entertain him, you get to embrace what girls do best at THE best time of the year! Black Friday Shopping with none other than.....your girlfriends!!!!! -Insert excitement here.

Embrace and enjoy singleness this Thanksgiving. I know I am!

The Best is Yet to Come.

I will embrace change-welcome it, but not fight it. For I know this is MY time, MY journey. MY time to rise up and live MY life to the fullest. So that in the end, MY journey was one to remember.

                                                      


The fact is, sometimes it’s really hard to walk in a single woman’s shoes. That’s why we need really special ones now and then to make the walk a little more fun.
-Carrie Bradshaw